Successful Leaders Invest in Their Marriage

IMG_2112I’ll spare you the fluffy intro. I coach leaders. I’ve noticed some common themes.  Today’s theme is this: Every leader I have worked with has seen tremendous positive results across the board when being intentional about improving their marriage. 

Sounds good, right? Put family first. I’ve heard leaders say this without hesitation, “If my wife needed me, I would drop everything and come running.” While that sounds honorable, it just isn’t enough.  I’ve intentionally spent a great deal of time with successful people over the past few years. I base my measure of success on much more than monetary riches. I look for things like joy, quality of life, sense of purpose, meaningful relationships and yes, financial success too.

This is what I noticed:

  • Their wives and husbands are treated like royalty. (Opening doors, lending a hand on stairs, etc.)
  • They consistently brag about their spouses and honor them with their actions and speech.
  • Investing in counseling,  attending marriage conferences and reading marriage books are a regular part of their marriage.
  • Although their children are a close second, it is clear that their spouses are put first.
  • Romantic dates, special gifts, hand holding and being present are not reserved for special occasions.

Really? Being a hopeless romantic makes you successful? Think about it.  Your marriage is a launch pad for everything you do.  It’s the place you return to at the end of the day. It’s the person you celebrate with when you win.  It’s the place you find support in times of struggle.  It’s the person you will enjoy your success with. If you don’t regularly invest in your marriage, you are putting a cap on your success.


I’ve heard it explained that marriage is a glass ball and the other areas of our lives are rubber balls.  As we juggle, marriage is the one ball you don’t want to drop.  While our careers, health, finances, etc. all have the potential to bounce back, our marriages are affected forever. A great marriage enhances everything we do and a toxic marriage can sabotage it.

Is your marriage life giving or is it sucking the life out of you? Either way, decide to start investing in your marriage today, your quality of life and the success you will experience depend on it.

I have a lot to learn about marriage but I the one thing I will never stop doing is working hard to intentionally make it better.

If you’re interested in being intentional about improving your marriage alongside a group of intentional leaders, put September 2nd on your calendar. The Life Leadership Mastermind begins. For more info, email me at

Life Leadership Mastermind


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4 thoughts on “Successful Leaders Invest in Their Marriage

  1. You know I believe in this 100%! I love the glass ball perspective – not only is it the one that you want to treat with the utmost respect, but it is often the incentive to keep the other balls cared for – taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually are all things you do to foster a healthy relationship with your spouse as well – because if you don’t take care of yourself, you cannot effectively take care of others – so by loving your spouse, you are also able to make yourself a priority and take care of yourself as well.
    I definitely believe in a marriage-centered and not child-centered relationship as well – I saw that in my house growing up and we do the same thing with our children. They are reminded daily about their individual importance in the family, yet they clearly understand that mommy and daddy time is sacred and vital to creating the home life we want.
    Thanks for the post and the great reminders!

    • You and Nathan model this so well Ashley! Thank you for taking the time to read my post. Keep doing great work!

  2. Mike,
    I am member of the “tend your marriage” band and work with high potential entrepreneurs and busy executives to help them NOT bankrupt their marriage in pursuit of success! You hit the nail on the head with this article and I am definitely going to share it with my coaching clients!
    With 32 years of marriage to an entrepreneur and 3 grown kiddos, plus 20 years working in this field, I’ve never heard the the glass ball analogy – LOVE IT!! And will use it!
    Intentionality is a huge part of why our marriage made it 32 years… we earned the marriage we enjoy today and find great delight in equipping others to do so as well.
    Great to find a fellow voice in this oh so important discussion! Thank you!